At the moment I open my eyes each day, words immediately flood my conscious mind. I don’t have to ask them to come. With the coming of the early morning sun, they come swirling around in my head. Much like leaves caught in the wind, I can’t ignore them, and I may as well enjoy them.
These words will come to me whether or not I desire them. What matters most is what I do with them. I must give them meaning and purpose. That’s my responsibility as a water. This is why most mornings I must immediately start my day with writing as many of them down as I can.
Words are just thought fragments, loosely translated into the common tongue I inherited. Limits to vocabulary hinder true perfect expression, of course. But, with care and practice, a writer can succeed in mostly getting their point across. At times, it’s only with great difficulty. Something interesting, never mind useful, almost never emerges on the first attempt.
Often, I’ll have two similar, but disparate enough, ideas intermingle, distracting from the original thought. Confusion sets in, creative chaos ensues, and frustration builds. Then, mental blocks occur, and a fear of losing my writer’s touch begins to swell.
The words must then be forced out, as the thoughts are still there, but stubbornly refuse to be translated into something understandable. Perhaps, those thoughts aren’t yet worthy of being shared. Or is it that I lack the skill necessary to share them properly and precisely?
Such awkward moments can’t be avoided when you constantly deal in words. Sentences and phrases never seem quite perfect. But at some point, you must decide that they are good enough for now. They can be altered later, as is the entire point of editing.
Words are building blocks for us to describe our thoughts. But they also are the lens through which we describe everything around us, not just in writing or in speech. They form our understanding of both ourselves and everything around us. Words can heal, divide, or unite us. That’s why we should always try to choose the best words that we can.
Of course, the words that come to me aren’t always the words I want. Sometimes they’re just plain nonsensical. But sometimes, I find the words I write down are broad generalizations, intrusive thoughts, or even unkind remarks. In those instances, I must choose to confront and examine them or to let them go.
As much as I want to send them back into the ether, I need to understand why these words emerged. This process requires me to be patient and build my own self-awareness. I must strive to remain in control of the narrative unfolding within my mind.
The right words will come if they are meant to be said. So I’ve had to learn to be patient with them. Once they do, I’ll figure out what to do with them later. As a writer, even once I figure it out and release the words into the world, I’m only a delivery girl. Then, it’s up to you who reads them to do with them that you will. It’s your decision to make if they’re worthy of your attention.
Hopefully, my words will do you some good. Maybe they’ll even inspire you to write something of your own. If my words inspire any positive action, or any action at all, then the words have done their part. I’ve done my job, and the world goes on.
~ Amelia Desertsong